Every Day, in Every Way

 

Time is suppose to be a Healer. A pain Reducer! A development in your life that over several repeating days into years, quiets our heartbeats. It is created to allow us growth in order to teach us not to hold such a pounding, body shaking, tears streaming effect on our very existence. Thirty-three years later and I can still cry a river on how much "I" miss my loved ones, especially my mom. If you are close to someone we learn that it is normal to always cry for what is absent in our lives. The making of new memories and the old memories clash. Why cant I have new ones, yet I know how lucky I am for experiencing the old. Each moment that I recall, I cry and then I rejoice. 

I do not write to be sad. I write to smile as a tear rolls down my cheek. So many memories! So many beautiful moments! The souls that I miss, they were one of a kind. No other can come close to how they affected me and directed my life. They gave me a purpose that at the time I did not understand. Now, I can see how they left their impressions on this world. Whether it be by their influence on a person, place or moment, they were unique and no other could have done as they did. That's what I want to remember! That's what I choose to remember and to carry on! 

Our moments of pain are not always about us. God never promised that we would be with the ones we love forever. He promised for a time, in which he determines their stay. When we feel pain, its hard to see clearly or to let anything, especially another emotional thought, in to our realm of common sense.

 Losing others is truly not always about us, no matter how close they are to us. Sometimes there are others who have lessons to learn and they need direction. "I" never knew where my mother and I separated because her and I where so much a like. She was my rock, my backbone, my true strength when all other was so out of my reach. She remains the wind beneath my wings, stabilizing me with all of her wisdom but I have found my beginning. I never needed to define us but now I understand the difference and the direction that I must go that my mother never could have traveled. I am blessed to have had an amazing teacher and to have been watched over by such a great woman. I miss so many of my loved ones EVERY DAY, however; I am thankful that in EVERY WAY of my life they each had an influence. 

A nutshell

Life can be viewed as a hard candy shell with all of our good tasty little treats inside each bite, but what happens for some of us when the bites are not always good and tasty? They begin to taste like the rest of the other worldly bitter treats. Or in some cases it all becomes tasteless and leaves us moving like a zombie without a rhyme or a reason for a direction. Its a motion that gives us no fulfillment but leads us to small completeness of minute task.
Life is not simple or unpleasurable its the way that we all choose to expose what it holds for us. Can we get lost in the daily motions of struggle? Yes, we can! Can we lose faith in ourselves and those around us? Yes, we can, but its up to us to pick ourselves back up and go forward with what life we have been given. There are people in this world who are begging God for just one more day! Please Lord, give me one more day of sight so I can see my children grow. One more day of hearing so I can hear their voices. One more day of speech so I can tell them how much they mean to me and how much I love them. One more day to feel with every inch of breath that inters my body so that I may touch them and hold them one last time.
When you see life as precious as it could be, why do we sometimes forget that we are part of a daily blessing that we have been allowed to share with other! We are the inside nourishing flavors of all that there is to make the world go around and around. To make each of us human and to form our mere existence! To live is to hold something so precious in the center of our hearts that no one can take it away! The breath that we experience carries with it lessons to be learned. These lessons have ups and downs and all the moments that we exist someone is watching.We must remember that its OK to have a struggle because it makes us stronger and in time defines us. The most important part is that we not only define ourselves but we define those who are watching. For most of us, the ones watching are the ones who are growing with every touch we give them. In a nutshell, its our loved ones that see how we handle life and that's how they base how they will handle life! What kind of view are you giving them?